Thursday, August 31, 2006

Miserable

I am so completely miserable. I've been sick for 7 weeks now. Throwing up multiple times a day, every day. Feeling bad all day. Feeling worse every night. I've been just about housebound for 7 weeks. The few times I have gotten out made me feel even worse. The heat does not help. I can't grocery shop. I can't cook. I can't clean. Laundry is piling up to be washed and we have a ton to be folded. I'm so weak. So drained. So useless. Everything is such a mess and I can't do anything about it. Most days I can barely tend to Valerie. I feel bad because she is not getting the attention from me she deserves. I just keep thinking of the days and weeks ahead of feeling like this and I don't know how I will get through it. :-(

My birthday was okay. Just another day over all. Clint sent me a dozen roses, but other than that I did not hear from him at all. Every year he does the same thing - no phone call. No email. No IM. No Happy Birthday whatsoever. You would think he would have learned his lesson as one of the biggest fights we ever had was started because of this. It was my birthday and I didn't hear from him AT ALL. So I called him.... and all he could say was "what do you want?" BIG argument followed that evening.... but apparently he still doesn't get it. Other than that, I spent the day resting at my mom's house. We went out to lunch and had cake. That was about it. Of course by last night I paid for eating regular food, and I felt like I was dying. *sigh*

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