Friday, October 28, 2011


Today, we said our final goodbye.

I think the service would have been just what he wanted. Everyone said the obituary (previous post) down to the photo was so him. The wake was small and there wasn't any fuss over him. He was cremated Thursday, and today his ashes were placed in the mausoleum with my Mom. A quick, simple military send off, no church stuff. He was a man of few words and that is what he got - presentation of the flag, taps, and a 21 gun salute.

He was a quiet man and so easy going. I don't recall many times that he ever got angry or yelled at me. Maybe twice and I probably deserved it. He gave me the greatest gift - his time. He always had time for me. He was fun and liked to do kid stuff with me. He was a great Dad and a wonderful Poppi to my girls.

Surprisingly, I am mostly "OK." I don't think the reality has sunk in yet. It's hard to believe he's really gone. There will be sad days ahead, but we will adjust and find a way to be OK.

Veronica is not coping well it seems. Sigh.

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Monday, October 24, 2011

Jack E. Russell


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Sunday, October 23, 2011


He was a good man. A great dad and a wonderful Poppi.

Jack Ernest Russell. March 14, 1933 - October 22, 2011.

I will miss him terribly.

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Saturday, October 15, 2011

Home again

We are home from the hospital. Dad is home.

Hospice came with in an hour and admitted him and brought meds and equipment.

All the same stuff I saw three years ago.

I can't believe I have to do this again.

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Sunday, October 09, 2011

Still here...

Day 4 at the hospital.

Thursday around 4:45am my Dad woke me up banging on the wall. He was too weak to stand or call for help, and had been awake for hours with a violent 'shaking' episode. He had a 103 fever, and at the advice of home health, we had to get to the emergency room immediately. So, I had to start calling people at 5am to find someone - anyone - to take the girls for me. NOT fun. I'm thankful for some great friends who were there for me.

Dad is still in the hospital battling some unknown infection. His fever seems to have subsided, so at least he is responding to the medicine. His white count is down from 103,000 to the 80,000's. His doctor says we can expect more of this, since he basically has no immune system.

The big question right now is all about Quality of Life. The comfort care medicines are working, but just not very well. My Dad is weak and struggling. His doctor has said it is up to him to decide when to end the comfort care and transition to hospice care.

I still can't believe this is happening. I am so sad.

Thursday, October 06, 2011


Here we are once again. :-(

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

Day by day

We are still here... just taking things day by day.

Dad is all moved in. We still have some organizing to do in the new office space, but it's getting better.

Dad had a few good days, but it seems most are bad. He's weak and tired, but doesn't sleep much. Doesn't eat much. Tires easily to do much of anything. Even the blood transfusion he had a week ago had little effect on him. Yesterday he started a new medicine. We are hoping they will find a magic mix of both so he'll feel a little better. It would be a temporary fix, but better than nothing.

Home health has been awesome. Someone comes almost every day - whether is the therapist or the nurse. They are only a phone call away if any issues arise. It's a good support system.

The plan is to transition from home health into hospice..... whenever that may be.

I cancelled our beach vacation. We were supposed to leave tomorrow. Valerie was so sad when I told her we weren't going. The beach will always be there though. Later.

Lots of people have offered to help. I'm glad I have people who care. It's just at this point, I'm not sure what anyone can do. I guess I am "ok." Most days I am so busy/exhausted that I don't have time to think or feel anything.

Sadly, this is how life goes.

Day by day.

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Sunday, October 02, 2011

Sunday citar ~ find the cat

Welcome to Sunday Citar!

Many of you have likely seen this.... can you find the cat? Took me a few minutes, but I found him!! Valerie's teacher even had the kids look for him on the promethean board in her class.

Anyway, here's my version.... can you spot the cat in this picture??

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